最有趣、最强大的额外文书之一
Each year,one of the greatest challenges my students face is the dreaded Why Essay. It seems like almost every school makes their applicants write some words about “why do you want to attend our college?” or “what led you to apply?” or “what do you love about us?” in addition to the Personal Statement.
每年申请季，我的学生面临的最大挑战之一就是可怕的“Why Essay”。似乎每一所学校都会让他们的申请人写一些关于“你为什么想上我们学校?”或者“是什么促使你申请我们学校？”或者“你喜欢我们什么？”，作为个人陈述的补充。
I’ve seen so many students become frustrated and lost by these essays. They feel that most of the colleges seem too much alike. How can they possible write an original essay for each one? They spend hours and hours doing research online only to throw up their hands in exasperation and wonder what crazy reason would compel these colleges to want to hear about themselves. They complain that Why Essays are tedious, dull, confusing, and useless. As a frazzled student once said to me:“I want to make the admission officers write a Why Essay about why they love Why Essays!”
我看到过很多学生因为这些文章而变得沮丧和迷茫。他们觉得大多数大学都太相似了。他们怎么可能为每个学校写一篇原创文章呢？他们花了很多时间在网上做研究，结果却愤怒地举手投降，想知道是什么疯狂的理由迫使这些大学想要了解学校自己。他们抱怨这篇文书枯燥乏味、令人困惑、毫无用处。正如一个疲惫的学生曾经对我说：“我想让招生官写一篇Why Essay去解释他们为什么喜欢Why Essay！”
I understand the stress that these essays cause. However, my many years of experience has shown me that the problem isn’t the Why Essays themselves. The problem is that students are taking the wrong approach to the prompts. In fact, I believe that Why Essays are one of the most interesting and powerful supplements that a student can write. A well-written Why Essay can make a big impact on an effective application!
我理解这些文章造成的压力。然而，我多年的经验告诉我，问题不在于Why Essay本身。问题在于，学生们理解题意的方式是错误的。事实上，我认为Why Essay是学生可以写得最有趣和最强大的额外文书之一。一篇写得好的Why Essay可以对一份有效的申请产生很大的影响！
大学想要了解的是你
To help my students understand the potential of a Why Essay, I always teach them this key fact: Like every essay in your application, the Why Essay isn’t about the college. It’s about you. The AO’s may be asking “why do you want to attend their school” but in reality, they are trying to figure out who you are, what you’re interested in, and how you will fit in and contribute to campus life.
为了帮助我的学生理解Why Essay的潜力，我总是告诉他们这个关键事实：就像你申请中的每一篇文章一样，Why Essay不是关于学校的，而是关于你的。招生官可能会问“你为什么想上他们的学校”，但实际上，他们想要了解的是你是谁，你对什么感兴趣，以及你将如何融入校园生活并为之作贡献。
What? The colleges don’t actually want to hear about themselves?
什么？大学真的不想听他们自己的事吗？
Exactly! Think about it. The AO’s already know everything that their college has to offer. They know all the interesting academic programs, the campus culture, the unique extracurricular offerings. They’ve seen every possible justification for why their school is “好棒”. But you know what they don’t know yet? They don’t know about YOU.
完全正确！想一想，招生官已经知道他们学校能提供的一切了。他们知道所有有趣的学术项目，校园文化，独特的课外活动。他们已经看到每一个解释为什么他们学校好棒可能的理由。但他们还不了解什么呢？他们不了解你。
When students who haven't received my guidance first send me drafts of their Why Essays, I see that they often fail to understand this important fact. I read essays that have detailed breakdowns of an economics department or carefully researched discussions about extracurricular clubs. What I rarely get from these essays is some new information about the student that is impressive or relevant. These essays are about the college, not about the student.
当那些没有得到我指导的学生第一次交给我他们的Why Essay草稿时，我发现他们经常没有理解这个重要的事实。有的文书里包括了一些关于经济学院详细分析，或者仔细研究过的、关于课外俱乐部的讨论。但我很少从这些文章中得到一些关于学生的，令人印象深刻或具有关联性的新信息，这些文章是关于大学的，不是关于学生的。
What I tell these students is simple but powerful advice. Look at the essay as an opportunity to tell the AO important aspects of yourself not revealed in other parts of the application, reinforce your overall message to them, and communicate how you will engage with their campus community. When you approach Why Essays that way, not only will your essays be better, but they’ll become a lot easier to write, too!
我告诉这些学生的是简单而有力的建议：把这篇文章看作一个机会，告诉招生官你在申请的其他部分没有披露的重要方面，向他们强调你的整体信息，并传达你将如何融入他们的校园社区。当你用这种方式去代写Essay，不仅会写得更好，而且会更容易写出来！
两篇文书的对比
Let’s discuss some examples. Here’s an essay that Yale asked for recently: What is it about Yale that has led you to apply? (125 words or fewer)
让我们讨论一些例子。这是耶鲁大学最近提出的一篇文书：是什么让你申请耶鲁的？（字数限制:125字以内）
Below is one draft from an applicant. As you read, ask yourself what the AO might be learning about the student from the essay:
以下是申请人的一份文书草稿。当你阅读时，问问自己，招生官可能从这篇文章中了解到关于学生的什么信息:
Now let’s look at another example. Here’s a different draft from the same applicant. Again, keep in mind the perspective of the AO as you read:
现在让我们看另一个例子。这是同一申请人的不同草稿。同样，在阅读时，请牢记前文提到的招生官的观点:
Which essay you think is more valuable to the AO? Which one is more impressive? Which essay would you “admit” to Yale if you had the choice. Why?
你认为哪篇论文对招生官更有价值?哪一个更令人印象深刻?如果让你选择，你会“录取”哪篇文章进入耶鲁?为什么?
Of course, the second essay is the stronger one. In the first essay, the student clearly did her research. We learn about Yale. We learn a little about Thucydides, too. She even picked outa professor she liked. But we learn almost nothing about the applicant herself. The essay is focused around Yale, not the student.
当然，第二篇文章更有力。在第一篇文章中，这个学生显然做了她的研究。我们了解了耶鲁。我们也学到了一些修昔底德的知识。她甚至挑了一个她喜欢的教授。但我们对申请人本人几乎一无所知。文章的重点是耶鲁大学，而不是学生。
Conversely, look at all the interesting things we learn about the applicant in the second essay:
She has a passion for the academic field of Western Philosophy.
She is a self-starter and is willing to work outside of class to enrich herself.
She is eager to engage with other students to discuss ideas
She is active about creating opportunities for students to get involved in her interests.
She applies her academic knowledge to issues outside of the classroom.
She is looking for a college that prizes rigorous, communal intellectual experiences.
相反，看看我们在第二篇文章中了解到的关于申请人的所有有趣的事情:
她对西方哲学学术领域充满热情。
她是一个积极主动的人，愿意在课外工作来充实自己。
她渴望与其他学生一起讨论想法
她积极创造机会让学生参与到她的兴趣中。
她将自己的学术知识应用于课堂之外的问题。
她正在寻找一所重视严谨的，共享的知识体验的大学。
All those amazing things from just a little, 125 word essay! You should aim for your work to have the same kind of impact.
所有这些神奇的东西都来自一篇125字的短文！你应该让你的文书具有同样的影响力。
So, when it comes time to write the numerous Why Essay this season, don’t despair or get too hung up on research and specifics about the school. Instead, my advice is to focus on storytelling about yourself. A good college mentor can help you figure out this story, how to communicate it effectively, and how to connect it to the unique qualities of the colleges you are applying to.
所以，当这申请季要写一篇关于Why Essay的文章时，不要绝望，也不要对学校的研究和细节过于执着。相反，我的建议是专注于讲述关于自己的故事。一个好的大学申请导师可以帮你弄清楚这个故事，如何有效地沟通，如何把它与你申请的大学的独特品质联系起来!
Happy writing！
写作快乐！
